Statuses and Sound Bites

I have memory problems. This is a result of a massive blow to the head that I received, courtesy of a drunk driver, about twenty years ago. I also post a lot of status updates on Facebook. These two things are related. I’m sure it’s annoying to all the people on my friends’ list who only know me peripherally. To which, my first thought is fuck them, it’s my Facebook page. Which is followed immediately by a second thought: oh, wait. No. It’s actually Mark Zuckerberg’s Facebook page, as he owns all of the content on there. But I like collecting random thoughts and tiny snippets of my day-to-day life in one location so that I can later go back and review what’s been going on in my own life. Funny things I’ve noticed. Interesting people I’ve met. A digital version of Leonard Shelby‘s tattoos, only less nefarious. So, I will now collect most of these here. It’s a lot easier and user friendly for me than scanning through a cumbersome Facebook timeline. Hopefully, you’ll enjoy them, too. ~6/26/12


7/3/12 – The amount of newspapers I find on my front porch every morning is becoming kind of overwhelming. What do I do with all of these? Also, either I was gifted a subscription to The Oregonian, or the nice gentleman in my complex is stealing someone else’s paid subscription and gifting it to me. I suspect I’m not the only one who’s waking up confused every morning.


6/26/12 – There’s a severely mentally retarded elderly gentleman who lives in my apartment complex, who I generally only see very early in the morning when I’m sitting on my front porch smoking. I’ve never spoken to him, though one time I was in the shared laundry room early in the morning and he came wandering in talking to himself and scared the shit out me. I screamed, then he screamed and went running out of the room. Generally, when I see him in the mornings, he’s just wandering around in circles, doing giant loops around the apartment grounds. I’ve noticed lately that he’s been collecting the free weekly paper, Food Day, from everybody’s front porch. This is fine with me, as I find these foisted-upon-me periodicals annoying and wasteful.

This morning, when I went outside, I found a giant pile of Food Day papers sitting on my front porch.


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